ACT 2
Scene 1

...time bids begone.
Enter Hostess Quickly of the tavern with two Officers, Fang and Snare, who lags behind.
Master Fang, have you entered the action?

...It is entered.
Where’s your yeoman? Is ’t a lusty yeoman?
Will he stand to ’t?

...Sirrah! Where’s Snare?
O Lord, ay, good Master Snare.

...Sir John Falstaff.
Yea, good Master Snare, I have entered him
and all.

...he will stab.
Alas the day, take heed of him. He stabbed me
in mine own house, and that most beastly, in good
faith. He cares not what mischief he does. If his
weapon be out, he will foin like any devil. He will
spare neither man, woman, nor child.

...for his thrust.
No, nor I neither. I’ll be at your elbow.

...within my view—
I am undone by his going. I warrant you, he’s
an infinitive thing upon my score. Good Master
Fang, hold him sure. Good Master Snare, let him
not ’scape. He comes continuantly to Pie Corner,
saving your manhoods, to buy a saddle, and he is
indited to dinner to the Lubber’s Head in Lumbert
Street, to Master Smooth’s the silkman. I pray you,
since my exion is entered, and my case so openly
known to the world, let him be brought in to his
answer. A hundred mark is a long one for a poor
lone woman to bear, and I have borne, and borne,
and borne, and have been fubbed off, and fubbed
off, and fubbed off from this day to that day, that it is
a shame to be thought on. There is no honesty in
such dealing, unless a woman should be made an
ass and a beast to bear every knave’s wrong. Yonder
he comes, and that arrant malmsey-nose knave,
Bardolph, with him. Do your offices, do your offices,
Master Fang and Master Snare, do me, do me,
do me your offices.

...the channel.They draw.
Throw me in the channel? I’ll throw thee in
the channel. Wilt thou, wilt thou, thou bastardly
rogue?—Murder, murder!—Ah, thou honeysuckle
villain, wilt thou kill God’s officers and the King’s?
Ah, thou honeyseed rogue, thou art a honeyseed, a
man-queller, and a woman-queller.

...rescue, a rescue!
Good people, bring a rescue or two.—Thou
wot, wot thou? Thou wot, wot ta? Do, do, thou
rogue. Do, thou hempseed.

...peace here, ho!
Good my lord, be good to me. I beseech you
stand to me.

...thou upon him?
O my most worshipful lord, an ’t please your
Grace, I am a poor widow of Eastcheap, and he is
arrested at my suit.

...For what sum?
It is more than for some, my lord; it is for all I
have. He hath eaten me out of house and home. He
hath put all my substance into that fat belly of his.
To Falstaff.
But I will have some of it out again, or I
will ride thee o’ nights like the mare.

...I owe thee?
Marry, if thou wert an honest man, thyself
and the money too. Thou didst swear to me upon a
parcel-gilt goblet, sitting in my Dolphin chamber at
the round table by a sea-coal fire, upon Wednesday
in Wheeson week, when the Prince broke thy head
for liking his father to a singing-man of Windsor,
thou didst swear to me then, as I was washing thy
wound, to marry me and make me my lady thy wife.
Canst thou deny it? Did not Goodwife Keech, the
butcher’s wife, come in then and call me Gossip
Quickly, coming in to borrow a mess of vinegar,
telling us she had a good dish of prawns, whereby
thou didst desire to eat some, whereby I told thee
they were ill for a green wound? And didst thou not,
when she was gone downstairs, desire me to be no
more so familiarity with such poor people, saying
that ere long they should call me madam? And didst
thou not kiss me and bid me fetch thee thirty
shillings? I put thee now to thy book-oath. Deny it if
thou canst.

...and in person.
Yea, in truth, my lord.

...Come hither, hostess.
He speaks aside to the Hostess.

...am a gentleman!
Faith, you said so before.

...words of it.
By this heavenly ground I tread on, I must be
fain to pawn both my plate and the tapestry of my
dining chambers.

...on to this.
Pray thee, Sir John, let it be but twenty
nobles. I’ faith, I am loath to pawn my plate, so God
save me, la.

...a fool still.
Well, you shall have it, though I pawn my
gown. I hope you’ll come to supper. You’ll pay
me all together?

...on, hook on.
Will you have Doll Tearsheet meet you at
supper?

...Let’s have her.
Hostess, Fang, Snare, Bardolph, Page, and others exit.

Scene 4

...find out Sneak.
Enter Hostess and Doll Tearsheet.
I’ faith, sweetheart, methinks now you are in
an excellent good temperality. Your pulsidge beats
as extraordinarily as heart would desire, and your
color, I warrant you, is as red as any rose, in good
truth, la. But, i’ faith, you have drunk too much
canaries, and that’s a marvellous searching wine,
and it perfumes the blood ere one can say “What’s
this?” How do you now?

...I was. Hem.
Why, that’s well said. A good heart’s worth
gold. Lo, here comes Sir John.

...now, Mistress Doll?
Sick of a calm, yea, good faith.

...conger, hang yourself!
By my troth, this is the old fashion. You two
never meet but you fall to some discord. You are
both, i’ good truth, as rheumatic as two dry toasts.
You cannot one bear with another’s confirmities.
What the good-year! One must bear, and to Doll
that must be you. You are the weaker vessel, as they
say, the emptier vessel.

...rogue in England.
If he swagger, let him not come here. No, by
my faith, I must live among my neighbors. I’ll no
swaggerers. I am in good name and fame with the
very best. Shut the door. There comes no swaggerers
here. I have not lived all this while to have
swaggering now. Shut the door, I pray you.

...thou hear, hostess?
Pray you pacify yourself, Sir John. There
comes no swaggerers here.

...is mine ancient.
Tilly-vally, Sir John, ne’er tell me. And your
ancient swaggerer comes not in my doors. I was
before Master Tisick the debuty t’ other day, and, as
he said to me—’twas no longer ago than Wednesday
last, i’ good faith—“Neighbor Quickly,” says
he—Master Dumb, our minister, was by then—
“Neighbor Quickly,” says he, “receive those that
are civil, for,” said he, “you are in an ill name.”
Now he said so, I can tell whereupon. “For,” says
he, “you are an honest woman, and well thought
on. Therefore take heed what guests you receive.
Receive,” says he, “no swaggering companions.”
There comes none here. You would bless you to
hear what he said. No, I’ll no swaggerers.

...him up, drawer.
“Cheater” call you him? I will bar no honest
man my house, nor no cheater, but I do not love
swaggering. By my troth, I am the worse when one
says “swagger.” Feel, masters, how I shake; look
you, I warrant you.

...you do, hostess.
Do I? Yea, in very truth, do I, an ’twere an
aspen leaf. I cannot abide swaggerers.

...hardly offend her.
Come, I’ll drink no proofs nor no bullets. I’ll
drink no more than will do me good, for no man’s
pleasure, I.

...our company, Pistol.
No, good Captain Pistol, not here, sweet
captain!

...draws his sword.
Good Captain Peesell, be quiet. ’Tis very late,
i’ faith. I beseek you now, aggravate your choler.

...foul for toys?
By my troth, captain, these are very bitter
words.

...not Hiren here?
O’ my word, captain, there’s none such here.
What the good-year, do you think I would deny her?
For God’s sake, be quiet.

...Atropos, I say.
Here’s goodly stuff toward!

...you downstairs.They fight.
Here’s a goodly tumult. I’ll forswear keeping
house afore I’ll be in these tirrits and frights. So,
murder, I warrant now. Alas, alas, put up your
naked weapons, put up your naked weapons.

...valiant villain, you.
to Falstaff
Are you not hurt i’ th’ groin?
Methought he made a shrewd thrust at your belly.

...by the ears.
O, the Lord preserve thy good Grace! By my
troth, welcome to London. Now the Lord bless that
sweet face of thine. O Jesu, are you come from
Wales?

...virtuous, civil gentlewoman!
God’s blessing of your good heart, and so she
is, by my troth.

...I know not.
No, I warrant you.

...thou wilt howl.
All vitlars do so. What’s a joint of mutton or
two in a whole Lent?

...knocks at door.
Who knocks so loud at door? Look to th’ door
there, Francis.

...thyself. Farewell, farewell.
Well, fare thee well. I have known thee these
twenty-nine years, come peasecod time, but an
honester and truer-hearted man—well, fare thee
well.

... Mistress Tearsheet!
What’s the matter?

...to my master.
O, run, Doll, run, run, good Doll. Come.—
She comes blubbered.—Yea! Will you come, Doll?
They exit.

ACT 5
Scene 4

...these pleasant days.
Enter Hostess Quickly, Doll Tearsheet, and Beadles.
No, thou arrant knave. I would to God that I
might die, that I might have thee hanged. Thou hast
drawn my shoulder out of joint.

...thou paper-faced villain.
O the Lord, that Sir John were come! I would
make this a bloody day to somebody. But I pray God
the fruit of her womb might miscarry.

...you she-knight-errant, come.
O God, that right should thus overcome
might! Well, of sufferance comes ease.

...to a justice.
Ay, come, you starved bloodhound.

...Death, Goodman Bones!
Thou atomy, thou!

...rascal. Very well.
They exit.